A is for Adulthood and Aging
"It takes Courage to grow up and become who you really are"
-E.E. Cummings
This past week, I turned 43 which officially brings me into my early-forties, and a couple of years ago I wrote another post about adulthood/aging, but I've gained some insight since then-thankfully!
Adulthood is more than eating whatever and whenever you desire and cool responsibilities, it's a mindset and a 'heartset.' I'm not sure if we talk about how being an adult feels. Here are some of the things I've learned since I last wrote on this matter:
*the things you've learned/experienced means something. It's all contributed to who you are now as an adult
*adulthood is not a destination or a place to settle. This is where things can get too comfortable if we let it. It's good to be open, explore and to keep learning new things. It's healthy and humans are fluid changing beings and if you're afraid of change, take the hand of a good friend ask for company on the journey.
*after years of being hard on yourself, you do start to ease up on yourself-a bit- and you aren't as hard on others either. You know that no one is perfect and we're all trying every day to be our best, besides the pursuit of absolute perfection is not possible, not to mention exhausting! Your heart and mind need a break, and adults are lucky enough to know who we are by now and pursue what makes us joyful in spite of (or maybe because of) the greater world telling us how we need constant perfection.
*you really do start to not care what other think of you. It's refreshing, however, it doesn't mean being a doormat, or being reckless with our words and actions! It's about finding balance, picking your battles and knowing what those are. It takes time, and if you're like me, a lot of tongue biting along with many foot-in-mouth moments! But, the feeling of shrugging off criticism from others who aren't you, and living your life is liberating an humbling.
*you get to look back on your life. For some, its not easy or desired to look back, only forward. Wether you're where want to be/or thought you would be in life, looking back can give some perspective. For me, my thirties were such a rollercoaster, and I was surrounded by toxic people, heavy drinking, feeling stuck, and trying to find the best way out of it. I knew I lost my way, and nearly lost me, but when I think back to those years, and the life I'm building now, I can smile. Hopefully, we can all do the same. If not, as I said before, adulthood is fluid and there's plenty of time to change the storyline of your life-one that brings a smile to your face.
I didn't think I would ever feel this way about getting older and how much I enjoy the present age I'm living. Are there regrets? Mmmmm....a couple. Do I have a life like some of my friends and peers, such as husband/children/house, no. But, what I do have is a loving family, friends that have been by my side for years, and a purpose that fills me with joy.What I do have is a new decade to enjoy and build a life that makes me feel good and a heart open to steer on my own path. Can't wait to see what this year will bring!
Thank you for reading!
-E.E. Cummings
This past week, I turned 43 which officially brings me into my early-forties, and a couple of years ago I wrote another post about adulthood/aging, but I've gained some insight since then-thankfully!
Adulthood is more than eating whatever and whenever you desire and cool responsibilities, it's a mindset and a 'heartset.' I'm not sure if we talk about how being an adult feels. Here are some of the things I've learned since I last wrote on this matter:
*the things you've learned/experienced means something. It's all contributed to who you are now as an adult
*adulthood is not a destination or a place to settle. This is where things can get too comfortable if we let it. It's good to be open, explore and to keep learning new things. It's healthy and humans are fluid changing beings and if you're afraid of change, take the hand of a good friend ask for company on the journey.
*after years of being hard on yourself, you do start to ease up on yourself-a bit- and you aren't as hard on others either. You know that no one is perfect and we're all trying every day to be our best, besides the pursuit of absolute perfection is not possible, not to mention exhausting! Your heart and mind need a break, and adults are lucky enough to know who we are by now and pursue what makes us joyful in spite of (or maybe because of) the greater world telling us how we need constant perfection.
*you really do start to not care what other think of you. It's refreshing, however, it doesn't mean being a doormat, or being reckless with our words and actions! It's about finding balance, picking your battles and knowing what those are. It takes time, and if you're like me, a lot of tongue biting along with many foot-in-mouth moments! But, the feeling of shrugging off criticism from others who aren't you, and living your life is liberating an humbling.
*you get to look back on your life. For some, its not easy or desired to look back, only forward. Wether you're where want to be/or thought you would be in life, looking back can give some perspective. For me, my thirties were such a rollercoaster, and I was surrounded by toxic people, heavy drinking, feeling stuck, and trying to find the best way out of it. I knew I lost my way, and nearly lost me, but when I think back to those years, and the life I'm building now, I can smile. Hopefully, we can all do the same. If not, as I said before, adulthood is fluid and there's plenty of time to change the storyline of your life-one that brings a smile to your face.
I didn't think I would ever feel this way about getting older and how much I enjoy the present age I'm living. Are there regrets? Mmmmm....a couple. Do I have a life like some of my friends and peers, such as husband/children/house, no. But, what I do have is a loving family, friends that have been by my side for years, and a purpose that fills me with joy.What I do have is a new decade to enjoy and build a life that makes me feel good and a heart open to steer on my own path. Can't wait to see what this year will bring!
Thank you for reading!
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